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Posts tagged ‘broken bones’

Of Barstools and Drunken Boyfriends…

During round 2 with my first love, Chris, we were basically meeting mostly at the Menagerie. One of two gay watering holes in Riverside. I was friendly with the bar tender (Adrian, I believe at that time) and also the bar-back Derek. We’d joke all the time and it was fairly fun. Chris was being especially touchy-feely that night.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good public groping by a hot guy (especially when he is my boyfriend!) as the next, but there is a line a guy just can’t cross. I am sitting on the end barstool on the side next to the pool table. My usual place, since I was waiting for that lone sad table to finally clear up for our turn at ball smacking with a pole. This also means we are in direct line of sight for the front doors. No big deal. Until I hear… Ziiiiiip!

I glance down and Chris has undone my zipper. He is 3 sheets to the wind and lookin’ to add on another sail. I blink and try desperately to think of what on earth he has planned. The place was moderately full too. Holy FUCK! He cannot be thinking he gonna… I panic as his head descends toward my lap. And he’s got a firm grip on my thighs trying to get me to spread my legs. I am doomed if he makes it to my crotch, ’cause I just know he’s gonna do what he is threatening, right there in front of everyone. Exhibitionist I ain’t! So I scoot backwards on the seat trying to escape that fate. Did I mention these are really bar stools? With no backs?

I slid off the backside of the stool and went straight down to the floor in one swoop. THUD!!! I am now sitting on the nice hardwood floor with a barstool between my legs and a drunken boyfriend with huge, startled eyes draped over it staring down at me dumbfounded at how I ended up down there in the first place. Then the pain comes. Intense pain. I think I broke my ass! No, I know I broke my ass. This fuckin’ sucks people!

I couldn’t really even be mad at him. He honestly wasn’t trying to hurt and humiliate me in one go. No really, he wasn’t. He was just randy and wanting somethin’ somethin’ and forgot we were in a public area with a gazillion interested eyes watching every single move he was making. He really was a sloppy drunk when he got toasted. *sigh* Well, he helps me up. The startled silence is immediately filled with the gaggle of geese and turkey babble gossip at my undignified adventure. I took Pickled Boy home and shoved him into his own bed and then went home to mine. Damn that hurts still.

Turns out, he broke my tailbone. I didn’t really figure that out until about a couple of weeks after it finally healed. Lying in bed, he ran his finger down my spine and was feelin’ sparky so went all the way down, right to the tailbone. Which was now bent inward permanently. *sigh* So, I have that loving souvenir from my first love until the day my bones finally disintegrate into dust. Joy!